Sunday, May 22, 2011

weekend of fun!

Best part of the evening...
My parents are in Washington for my niece Kate's baptism yesterday, so I took all the kids to Peter's seminary graduation tonight. We sat down at 5:50 and I wrestled with Joy for the next hour and 10 minutes til it was over. However, I looked over during the closing song and Kim is sitting holding the hymn book right in front of her face with one hand and just singing along joyfully. Cracks me up because Kim is blind, but she has a very keen sense (sometimes) of appropriate things that typical people do. I started laughing under my breath and she immediately looked over and in a loud whisper,
"What's so funny? What are you laughing at?"
How could she hear me? I was just smiling really big and laughing softly...
She is just right with it sometimes, and when she is, it's hilarious.

It made the crazy church day with the fam all worth it.

Ah, this week was a good one. A roller coaster kind of week with some lows and highs.
Monday was kind of a downer day at work. I had not followed through with booking some flights and I realized Monday morning that I had missed my window of opportunity-the flights had trippled the cost. Yikes. I was upset, my boss was upset and it just dampered my whole day.

Well, last weekend, we had a life mastery training up at the Impact Training Center and it was all about DNA. We had this fantastic guy come and share his research about DNA. He studied at Johns Hopkins and became a critical care specialist and pulmonologist-Ren, just like you- and then was interested in the spiritual implications of his research, so he gave a great perspective on the relationship between the physical and spiritual aspects of DNA and it was fascinating!

I missed blogging last week and now I know why I blog every week, because I can't remember what I did more than a week ago.

Anyway, back to this week. I made my half marathon training plan with Joe, so I ran 3.5 miles on Tues and then 5 miles on Saturday.

It rained all day everyday this week pretty much, so our plans to go play kickball with Lehi Elementary on Friday got cancelled-I was so relieved, because I haven't quite put all the details together. We will go this week on Thursday. Dear Weather, be good to us.
Friday was a funny day. First thing in the morning I was putting all the Costco things away around the office and Bonnie walks past me and urgently tells me
"I need to meet with you. Right now. In the Spring Training Room."
"umm...can I come see you when I am done putting this away? What am I going to do with this cart full of stuff?"
I followed her in to the Spring Training Room and she turns around...
"I wripped my pants!"
"Ah (gasp) HA HA HA!"
Straight across from the very top of her inseam/crotch area to halfway under the pocket, sure enough, the biggest wrip I have ever seen. HA!
"How in the world did you do that?"
B: "I was getting down to do push ups because I broke a rule." (overeaters club rules-she ate dessert and didn't work out)
"What am I going to do?"
"Well, your flowy cardigan that you're wearing mostly covers it up, I think you'll be okay."
Consequently, my daily task whenever I saw Bonnie was to make sure that everything was okay on the backside.

Friday we hosted a networking event for the Womens Tech Council and I was the hostess and contact. It was geared towards women in the work place and part of the panel discussion was about how women show up in the corporate world and what expectations accompany them. Super interesting. Anyway, it was really fun and I found out that I knew the co-founder, I danced with her younger sister at Rocky Mtn Ballet years ago. Small world.
I was really pleased with how the event turned out and I felt like it got me back on track. Since Monday I felt a little off with work, just not put together and on the ball like usual, but I reclaimed my on-top-of-it-ness with this event and am ready to go again.

Friday night Bonnie and I hosted a dinner party with Joe Pa, his wife Shauntell and baby Jaden, Adam, and my friend Terrell came. It was a blast! I met Terrell through Graden on Conference weekend. He is this big, tall, hilarious, teddy bear-type black guy. We saw each other at JCWs a few weeks ago and he texted Graden,
"I just saw Meredith at JCWs, she is pretty attractive"
yes, this made my day and I anticipated that he would call, but never did. So I facebooked him and invited over for this dinner party. He brought up the text message and expressed how embarassed he was that Graden forwarded it on to me. He thought I would be repulsed by it, so he didn't do anything. But I assured him that it made my day and that any girl would love to hear that. Anyway, we had tacos and then went over to Yogurt Bliss for some YUMMY Fro Yo. Mmmmm...Fun time.
It was interesting being on a quazi-date. It was a little uncomfortable, I think for a couple reasons, 1-I haven't been on a date for a while, so just out of practice, and 2-A couple weeks ago, I kind of gave men the boot when I was fed up with them and I realize now that I closed a door in my heart. I go back and forth: Career, Marriage & Family, Career, Marriage & Family... Ideally I want it all and I know I will in due time. But for now, it is a balancing act of progressing on both paths.
So all weekend, I have been praying for a soft heart and courage to open the door to dating and marriage and move forward with faith, trust, and willingness to turn up the flirt.

Saturday I spent the morning at our old building programming key cards-to no avail. That security system is the bain of my existence, sigh, 2.5 hours with no success even though everything was programmed correctly.
Anyway, I quickly forgot the frustration as I headed out to play golf-for the first time of my life! I met up with JC and Taylor from work and Taylor's 9 yr old son (first time too).
Super Fun! Loved the game, we only played 9 holes, which was perfect, it was a gorgeous day... and I was with a pretty cute boy. It all made for a great afternoon, afterwards, I met up with JC and his parents and sister at JCWs for a bite, which was fun.
It was such a gorgeous day, that I didn't want to go inside, so I just crashed for an hour in my car. Took a nap that is, no auto accident...
Then I did my 5 mile run. The last 2 miles were the easiest. I put my ipod on shuffle and just started running. All of a sudden, I was running to
"If you choose the very first step on the road, you'll also choose the last..."
Yes, it is my turn on earth. Ha!

Saturday night I went and hung out with the fam, put the kids to bed and just crashed-so tired from all the sun.
Mmm... but I am ready for summer.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

This was my Tuesday...

Mostly rested from a good night's sleep I awoke with anticipation to slip into my fantastic white blazer with my black skinnies and pumps and straighten my hair in the "can't go wrong" style, and head to work on time and on the ball.
All of the above happened as planned except for I almost went to work with 2 different shoes on. I tried on my black pumps and taupe pumps to compare and ask for feedback and in an effort to get out the door I forgot to change my shoe. After I put myself completely together and Bonnie left with a short " I'll see ya there." I walked confidently out to my car.
eh.
wait.
OH SHOOT. Really?
I parked in the handicap stall last night as I occasionally have before and as everyone else does and was the result of the random tow patrol.
Oh shoot.
ringing Bonnie.
Mere: "Hiiiii. Can you come pick me up?"
Bonnie: "Why?" kind of pet-peeved.
Mere: "Because my car's not where I parked it. "
Bonnie: "Well, are you sure it's not where you parked it, do you know where you parked it?"
Mere: "Yeah. I parked in the handicap stall."
Bonnie: "Oh. Okay, well you're car's not there because it got TOWED because you parked in the handicap stall. "
Mere: "Yeah."
Bonnie: "Well, I just picked up Swathi, so I will come pick you up. "
Mere: "okay, thanks."

Mere starts hiking to the entrance, in matching shoes of course, as Bonnie pulls in and stops.
She was sympathetic at this point. Or trying to be.
Bonnie: "shoot, sorry about your car" (inside she is thinking: Mere, not the smartest decision in the world. She was definitely pet-peeved at this point, but trying to hide it, and doing a good job.)
Mere: "Thanks for coming to pick me up."
Bonnie: "You know the tow truck's going to be over $100, right?!"
Don't worry, she's not heartless.
Mere: "Yeah, I know. Do you know who I can call about this?"
Bonnie: "I don't know. I don't have the HOA number in my phone. It's on my bill at home, but by the time we go home to get it, the HOA will probably not be answering their phones. Let's google it when we get to work. "
Mere: "hmm... would Naarah have it?"
Bonnie: "yeah. do you have her number?"
Mere: "Yeah. I'll text her. "

So, business as usual. Bonnie doesn't stop by like she usually does, which means meetings, meetings, and more meetings, which equals stress, over-extraversion, which equals grumpy assertiveness and orneryness, which she does a good job at hiding.

Five O-Clock rolls around.

**Bonnie's Disclaimer: "I had an extremely intense day. And it's five o-clock."

Walking down the corridor...

Bonnie: "so where's your car at?"
Mere: "oh, it's in South Provo, East Bay"
Bonnie looks at Mere with a 'you have GOT to be kidding me' and rolls her eyes.
Mere: "I know."
Bonnie: "Well! My run is totally shot today, and I 'm feeling fat, and I am muffin-topping in these pants, and tell me how much you love me and maybe I'll drive you down to South Provo."
Mere: "Wait. Aren't you supposed to tell me how much you love me and that you will drive me down to Provo?"
Bonnie ignores the question
Mere: "well, maybe I could get someone from my family to drive me down."
Bonnie: "No, I'll just drive you down, but we have leave RIGHT NOW, I have an appt at 6:30 and in order to make it to that, 20 minutes down, 20 minutes up, we got leave to leave right now because then I have the dinner with Naarah at seven, and I really hope they're on time with this interview thing."
Mere: "Okay, well I guess I'll go pickup my car and drive back here to finish my work for the day"
Bonnie: "okay, well what do you have to do?"
Mere: "I have to deposit these checks, the rest can wait for tomorrow"
Bonnie: "okay, well, how long is it going to take?"
Mere: "it usually takes me 6 minutes."
Bonnie: "Okay well, just do it now. I can wait 6 minutes" Bonnie calmly walks away (as she usually does when she is done with a conversation-she's an ISTJ)
Mere: "okay, i'll come get you when I'm done" (Meredith longingly and lovingly calls down the hall. She's an ENFP)
Mere. Shows up at Bonnie's desk in 6 minutes. She is finishing an impromptu meeting with Brett Beers, which she HATES impromptu meetings (because she's an ISTJ), and is laser point focused on her screen.
Bonnie: "Okay, I just got to send this email. "
Mere: sigh. relaxes in the chair and lets her legs fall open totally unladylike. But only for a moment until she hops up to finish one thing for her boss before Bonnie is ready to go.

We drive down to the tow shop. I hop out and walk across the gravel in my pumps and blazer to meet two 16 yr olds in their tow truck with their cigarettes waiting to collect my money. Borderline humiliating and totally merciless.

Monday, May 9, 2011

This week was a really good week. I cam back refreshed and ready to go from the weekend and grateful to be back at work. I rocked my outfit on Monday and walked cpnfidently through the office having let go of any expectations of boys paying attention and just got down to business. The result: the cute boys were extra friendly and flirtatious. What?! The less energy I put in to impressing them and drawing them in, the more they come around. What is this?
I am learning to balance putting my pharemones out there while simultaneously moving on with living my life.
Monday out of the blue, my buddy Mark sticks his head in my office and asks,
"When we went to Zuckerberg, you said you were thinking about grad school, are you still thinking about it?"
"eh...uh...(I am in the middle of a phone call and hotel negotiation-they are on hold)...uh, can I talk to you later?"
"It's a simple yes or no question"
"eh...uh... can I come talk to you later and give you the update?"
"Well, what's the update?"
Totally flustered a this point because my boss is listening to the whole conversation.
Mark smiles, laughs, and finally leaves.

Through the wall, my boss comments
"Wow, it's hard when you are asked tough questions in front of your boss."
Wow is right. Holy Cow. Totally caught off guard. The cat was let out of the bag and my hands were totally tied-well, my tongue was totally tied. I have only been thinking about grad school, so I haven't brought it up to my boss at all at this point. Well... thanks for blowing that out of the water.

Monday I signed up for the Hobble Creek Half-Marathon with Bonnie, Adam, and Joe! Wahoo! This was one of my New Year's goals, to run a half-marathon. This week I am making a training schedule. Can't wait. Okay, I can.
Monday after work, Bonnie and I went for a run along the canal. Beautiful run, except the most uncomfortable run of my life. About 3/4 mile in, I suddenly need to go to the bathroom, the kind that I would NEED toilet paper for. It was urgent and uncomfortable, talk about pelvic floor strengthening. Oh boy, it was funny to laugh about with Bonnie, but only for 5 seconds, then it just hurt and all I could do was keep running. We made it back to the car and after driving for a couple minutes, the sensation subsided and I was just fine.

Anyway...a little TMI, but I will want to look back at my blog and remember priceless moments like this.

Monday night I went to a late night Yoga class that absolutely burned my muscles off my bones. When I got home I went and started chatting with Bonnie on her bed in a dark room, we recapped the day and just kept chatting. She graciously instructed me on sex 101-505. It was more comfortable in the dark so she couldn't see how often I blushed. Thank you Bonnie.
Afterwards, we were both hungry for a snack. mmmm... crackers with cottage cheese. Whent he cottage cheese was gone, we ate almost a whole block of cream cheese (with crackers and salsa)...oopsy. It was delish, especially at 12:30 am.

Tuesday evening after work I went to the Mexican Market and bought some Horchata mix in preparation for our "Quatro de Mayo" powerstand at workie the next day. Then I met up with my dear friend Raven Alard at Magleby's for dinner. We had their steak smothered in mushroom sauce and their chicken pesto pasta, mmm... and their breadsticks....mmm...
We waddled out of there and drove around to continue our fantastic conversation. She is a girl after my own heart, very confident, doing amazing things with her life, and loving all of it. Except she has an extra spicy bite to her that I just love! It's the edge of confidence in the face of not knowing what to do that I am working on acquiring and that I admire so much in my friends that already have it-like Raven. What a gem! It was a great evening, and she translated the Horchata instructions for me since I don't ablo espanol.

Wednesday I pulled out my yellow dress and prepared eagerly for our Powerstand meeting. I mixed up the Horchata and set out the Jarritos and Chipotle did the rest. It was a fantastic Fiesta! My boss also presented the vision and mission of the company which was awesome. I love where I work and who I work with. It is a tremendous blessing to love going to work each day.

I work with people like Shan, the kind with style just oozing out of their ears. This is me channeling Shan... we showed up and found we both got the memo for white blazers and black skinnies. I just need some rockin' red pumps to finish it off.
Cinco de Mayo, I pulled out my black Spanish scarf with fringe and wore it over my black skinnies with my red lacey pumps, it was rockin! I got a "Whoa!" and then all the heads turned. Thursday, the Operations Team was born, so they threw a baby shower in honor of the birth. Here is the Operations Team-the coolest team ever!


See what I mean?! This is them at their best.


Bonnie.

They even had someone bring them a gift from their registry. We had nerf gun wars the rest of the day. Pretty great.


Also on Thursday, Dave Litchford came and gave his "Attitude Determines Altitude" presentation during lunch. Oh My! I forgot how hilarious he is. He was a total smash hit!




Friday was the most glorious day at work. Wow, I found a fantastic groove and was incredibly productive. MMM...Yeah!


Friday night, Body Logic performed at the Riverwoods in the gazebo. We found out the night before that it was cobblestone that we were dancing on, so we picked some other dances and revised them to accommodate. Wea re putting in our time dancing on 'crappy' stages. The whole experience was... an experience, fun because of the spontaneity aspect and great to dance outside. Kari Jo was sick for the last run of the concert (we did it 3 times), so I did my solo, impromptu. Thank you for muscle memory because my brain was in serious freak out mode. I got through it confidently and gracefully and it was fun besides.










We celebrated afterwards at Happy Sumo! Talked about our next show and made plans.


Friday night, KaLee (Bonnie's bestie in Idaho) and her friend Tiffany were in town, so we chatted and hung out with them til way past my bedtime, I was fightin' to stay awake.


Saturday we went to Kneaders for breakfast, cinnamon french toast, can't beat it.


After we said our good-byes I headed to Tunex, my home away from home it feels like. I have been here more Saturdays than not in the last few months and each time it costs me $150-$250. Not happy. This time it was going to be $600 repair-the last piece to fix on the exhaust system. Thank goodness it was not urgent, so I can prepare for this. I left in frustration and drove straight to the Subaru dealership to see about trading in my car. I drove a brand new Subaru Forrester and then an Outback.


Surprisingly, as I sat in the seat in the middle of luxury-it didn't even matter. It doesn't matter what kind of car I drive, and it's certainly not worth being tied to the amount of debt I would acquire owning this piece of fancy metal and parts.


I left and called my voice of reason, Carlton, my personal financial advisor. He calmed me down and pointed out that $600 now that will buy me a couple more years in my current car is much better than thousands of debt.


Yes. I agreed.


After I cooled off and realized that I was okay, I headed over to choreograph a 3rd grade dance festival piece to "The Monkees" theme song with Allie in my ward.


Funnest time ever and if Blogger would let me upload it, I would be so happy.


Sunday I went and checked out another singles ward. First time ever 'ward hopping', still not a fan. But for the sake of increasing the amount of people to meet, it worked. I ran in to Braun Edwards, an elementary--jr high--high school mate. Fun to see him and that he has turned out really well-no romantic interest. Thank you.


Sunday afternoon I crashed for a much needed nap, then went to wish my mother the best on her Mother's Day.


My sister Christina was there with her baby Jonathan Charles-first Mother's Day as a mother-so precsh. And baby JC is so cute-looks just like his daddy.


He loves his Aunt Mere.


Maiden, Mother, and Matriarch


And this is Bob, finishing up the potatoes on Sunday evening. The best thing in the world, makes me smile everytime.



Sunday, May 1, 2011

Hello all. anyone and everyone who reads this. Thank you for reading my blog. The purpose of this is mainly a journal for my own records since my memory is not one of my super fortes. I am reminded of this every time I go to compose a new post for the week and I can't even remember what happened that week. So it's good to take a moment and recount for the last week or two of my life, to see, evaluate, and account for the personal growth and learning.

Last Monday morning I cut my finger open. I was cutting an apple for my breakfast ready to walk out the door and my finger was under the apple when I was cutting it. When it stopped bleeding, the flesh was curdling out of the opening, it was a deep cut and kind of gross and cool at the same time. Bonnie looked at it and suggested stitches. What!? I grew up with the hospital and stitches being reserved for when your brain was sticking out of your head, we just didn't get stitches-ever! I called my mom and as typical "just put some gauze and a band-aid on it and let it heal". So that's what I did. It was a little embarrassing to text my boss that morning to let him know I will be in late to work due to the fact that I just cut my finger open. When I got to work my coworker Joe showed me his scar on his left pinky finger in the same spot where I cut mine. "Ah (gasp), we are going to have matching scars!" he exclaimed. Yes, Joe and I became blood siblings in that moment. Our conversation eased the pain from a slightly humiliating morning and a big ouchie. Who knew it would hurt so bad to cut your finger open? I didn't. So I had a big white gauze bandage on my finger for the week and now it is healing great.

Last weekend (Easter weekend) on Friday night we had a multi-ward talent show. I did my dance solo that I did for our Body Logic concert and it was really fun. The most stress-free performance I think I have ever had. The whole evening was fun. I ended up sitting by this super funny guy, so we were going back and forth commenting on the talents. I practiced my flirting skills, so it made the night fun. One of the Emcees was wearing a red flannel shirt with rainbow suspenders and boots, so at one point he commented that he only had 1 talent and the guy next to me leans over and whispers, "that flannel shirt".
"Yeah, that flannel shirt gets me every time" I whispered back through my laugh. It was hysterical and a lot of fun.
One act though, I even took pics of this one and will steal it for our next family reunion-so sisters take note..
3 girls and 1 guy (the guy I was sitting by) did a 'Grecian Urns' act that was out of this world hilarious. The guy posed in a 'Grecian Urn' pose and each of the 3 ladies had a pitcher of water. Periodically through out their skit, they drank water and spewed it-in different patterns according to the choreography. Too funny!
Afterwards, a group of us went and got frozen yogurt and watched the Star Trek movie, much to my resistance. I liked it more than I thought, but on a scale of 1-10, it was a 3.6. Not a fan of Star Trek.

Saturday morning I went and ran a 5K with my ward-first time running 3 miles outside in a long time. It was kind of the kick start to running outside, so I was determined to run the whole way and I made it! I got my iPod all synced up before and ran to Journey's Greatest Hits blasting in my ears "...Don't Stop. Believin"...
Saturday afternoon I went up to Ogden to hang out with Mags for her birthday. I took her some red tulips and cupcakes. She wanted to go the tulip festival for her birthday, so I brought the tulip festival to her. And these cupcakes. So Bonnie told me about this Vintage Cupcake Company in Ogden who make gourmet fantastic cupcakes, so I picked some up and we enjoyed them the whole weekend. So Yummy! Cookies and Cream, Coconut cake with coconut icing, Red Velvet, Double Chocolate, Carrot, etc. SO Yummy!

Sunday I went to church with Mags and to Bird and Nee's for Easter Dinner with Bonnie's family. Her whole family was there and it was a lot of fun! We visited, had yummy yummy food, and played Dance Dance on the Wii. Super fun. Then I took the Myers-Briggs Personality test. Bonnie's Dad, Russ, is certified in the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, so he can administer the personality test and give results and the whole deal. So I took the test before I left and he was going to score it and give it back to me on Thursday when he was coming to do a presentation for One on One about personality type.

This last week, I was motivated and ran 3 miles on Monday and Wednesday. Outside. I found a loop route right by my condo that I like-well, first one. I am still getting used to running outside, but running under the sun is the best. Being outside is invigorating and after a stressful work day on Wednesday, it was a great release and unraveling time to just run under the sun. Thank you for the sun and my body that can run.

Wednesday we had some VIP visitors were here for the quarterly board meeting that day. I thought I was prepared, but it ended up being a stressful, borderline frazzled day. There was just last minute copies to be made and stapled, wi-fi passwords to figure out, spoon for the fruit to run and get, gift bags to pack, etc. Then just being on the edge of my seat to take care of anything anyone might need-like printing and faxing a t-shirt request form for one of the visitors or calling a cab at the last minute, you know, things like that.
I was exhausted, but everything went well.

Then Thursday I somehow planned another stressful day where again I thought I was prepared, but it ended up not being as smooth as I planned. We had a new catering company for lunch that was doing a salad bar and bread. I imagined this great salad bar with lots of vegetables, boiled eggs, chicken, a variety of dressings, and some beautiful bread platters with a variety of breads, etc. Right? That's what I asked for. Well, they showed up late with loads of lettuce and spinach-good and healthy-but we ran out of all the toppings 2/3 way through everyone and the bread ended up being cheap-o rolls from Wal-mart that were carelessly dumped into platter toppers. So I am evaluating and digesting this while planning for Russ's presentation at noon as well. The food being late pushed back the presentation, so it created some confusion, waiting, and me running back and forth putting out the lunch fire while calmly setting up for the lunch presentation. It all turned out okay and I am cooling off this weekend before I call the caterer on Monday and tell him how it went. He called me during the presentation with a light-hearted "so how did it go?"
"um, we are in the middle of a presentation, can I call you back?" I was fuming.
Russ's presentation went really well and our team members liked it. Afterwards he gave me my test, according to Myers-Briggs I am an ENFJ(P) I think I am more P than J on most occasions.
Extroverted, Intuitive, Feeling, Judging, (Perceiving)

ENFJs are interpersonally focused, understanding, tolerant, appreciative, and facilitators of good communication. They enjoy working with others on a variety of tasks focused on the development of people.

ENFPs are enthusiastic, insightful, innovative, versatile, and tireless in pursuit of new possibilities. They enjoy working on teams to bring about change related to making things better for people.

My family will laugh, listen to the "potential pitfalls" and "suggestions for development"
  • May move on to new ideas or projects without completing those already started (hello AP english book list)
  • May overextend and try to do too much (I am the queen of double booking engagements)
  • May sweep problems under the rug when in conflict (yes. I am getting better at not doing this though)
  • May need to set priorities and then follow through
  • May need to learn to screen tasks and say "no" rather than do what is initially appealing
  • May need to apply project and time management skills to meet goals (hello time management :))
Enter Bonnie Bennion, an ISTJ, the perfect complement to me, Ha! We have had many good laughs about this. But that is why living with her is a dream, she is great at everything I am not naturally good at. However, the good news is that we are rubbing off on each other and both balancing out.

So my dear family, I am doing my best to manage my time well and speak up in conflict, but you got to know that I just wan't wired that way. :)

Thursday afternoon after blowing some steam off at lunch with Nee and Bird and Bonnie at JCW's, Ernst and Young came to film my boss, he is up for Entrepreneur of the Year, kind of a big deal. The corporate communications gal handled all of this, so I was actually relieved to answer some emails and take care of some projects. I knew the lady from last year, so we chatted on a tour of the office and I got to sit in on my boss's interview, which he totally rocked. It was fun, and really good to get more insight on the company and my boss as a person. As we just read about, I am all about that-people.
I really want my boss to take the Myers-Briggs test, I have a feeling that we are really similar and it is advantageous and disadvantageous. I will work on it.
Thursday evening I met my mom at Costco and shopped for Pete's Prom dinner that she was making. I got some pizza for dinner and we got to chat for a little bit. My mom's undivided attention, always a treat. As we caught up, I realized that I am learning how to balance pursuing dating and marriage as an overarching goal of mine at the same time that I live my life fully and move forward. I am getting better, but I would feel stuck whenever I spent my energy trying to date and be successful-something just wasn't working. So then I would go back to getting really involved with my job and someone would remind me to always be looking for my man. It would go back and forth like a pendulum, so now I am creating balance with that. Hooray! It's about time.

That conversation was so timely and I had a follow-up breakthrough on Friday talking to my friend Ingrid at the Inner Woman training that we were staffing this weekend up at the Impact Training center. I have been having this feeling that I will find my husband when I am in full bloom in my life and I am not there yet. She listened and affirmed me, then she looked me in the eyes and said "you don't know what you want yet". Bingo. It's true, I am still clarifying exactly what I want and I don't know yet. All these guys that I go out with are awesome and kind of fit, but it's like a slightly misfit puzzle piece-it just doesn't work. I was so relieved. Because I know I am still blooming and now I feel full permission to bloom naturally and carry on with my beautiful life. Perfect.
This was my first staffing experience at Impact and it was great! The womens training was amazing, I went through it in 2007, so I had forgotten a lot of the details and it was fantastic to review. It was all about celebrating womanhood in every sense of the word, so naturally it brought up a lot of tender feelings for my mother, sisters, and gratitude to be a woman!
Friday night I worked on my Visiting Teaching report and tied myself up in knots because it was so last minute. I didn't visit my sisters this month, I did call and chat for a few minutes and dropped off some M&Ms and a note. Bare minimum, and it bugged me, enough that I evaluated my commitment and decided to be a 100% visiting teacher going forward.

Saturday morning I woke up and ran the Thanksgiving Point 5K-first official organized race! Katie, another girl ont he staff trained for the half-marathon, but there wasn't time to run it before the training, so she ran the 5K and I ran it with her. Except she took off at the beginning with a 9 minute mile and steadied a 10.5 minute mile, finishing in about 35 minutes. It was really cool and a beautiful route.
I quickly showered and changed then headed up for the second day of Inner Woman and it was Incredible! I staffed with my sister Margaret and it was so fun to be there with her celebrating being a woman and our sisterhood! I love my sisters so much.